Thoughts Before the Sabbath

I am mostly avoiding social media. This is too bad, because I mostly enjoy pets and food and who is reading where, but I need to limit my diet, because the content has become too painful for me. We are all (by “we” I mean Jews, my status since birth, and by using the first-person plural I admit to taking a leap from which others are free to disagree) grieving–murder, hostages, war, and the many particulars of each. This list could go on for pages. My life experience tells me that we all grieve in different ways. Grief has its own trajectory and its own timetable. And I understand that there is no right way and no wrong way to grieve.

Additionally, we were all (there’s that “we” again) raised by people who lived through the Holocaust, either as literal survivors or as grieving onlookers, and, blessedly, some of our cohort were living during WWII. As much as the generation of our parents was a “silent generation,” it was also a generation marked by profound trauma. As a result, I think we are all messed up in a variety of ways. How many of your non-Jewish friends spend time thinking about who among their acquaintances would shelter them if the Nazis come, or what would you pack if you needed to leave forever in a hurry?

When my children were young and attended religious school, one assignment was to bring in the oldest Jewishly related object in your house. So many Shabbat candle holders, challah covers, kiddush cups, etc., were the one item saved by fleeing relatives. Not the intention of the assignment, I’m guessing, but there you go.

That brings us to today. In a time of profound grief, what can one do with the fear and anxiety that generates? Go to social media, of course. And how does one share that fear and anxiety? By talking smack about other Jews who do not agree with them. The left beats up the right. The right beats up the left. All of them experts, all locked in battle for the moral high ground. Isn’t the situation terrible enough? We are stuck in this, however you define this, together, like it or not. If we can’t talk to one another, where is the hope for peace?

So, I’ve stopped reading posts on social media, and I am not proud of that, but we each deal with grief in our own way.

In more upbeat news, first, we are still accepting submissions for the non-human beings issue. If you haven’t sent something, please do. altetogether@gmail.com, and note it’s a submission.

Second, join us at the ALTE Zoom Holiday Party. Make a wish and light a candle. Thursday, December 14 at 7:30 p.m. For the link, email altetogether@gmail.com. Please note in the header that you would like the link for the party. Thanks.