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Lovely essay. I share your hesitation about deleting people from my address book on my phone.. That's why I still hold onto my raggedy paper phone book, some addresses crossed out and updated, but no names ever deleted, no matter what the history or status of the relationship.

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founding

Yes--a thoughtful and moving essay. I'm 76 and have faced several such situations recently, but I keep a written address and phone number book also. There I can mark the date of death, if I know it, or just the date I learned of it. I suppose that I can also do this on my email and on my phone's "contacts" list, but instead I 've just deleted their names, fearing that I may accidentally send a message or an email to them. (It happened once, a typo, I think.) Particularly painful are cases of those people whose families haven't closed their Facebook accounts, so I and others get reminders of their birthdays, and lately, "memories" photos. Sometimes I post that so-and-so died last year, so people who've had only Facebook contacts with that person will know of their death.

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